My Bilateral mastectomy (12/2).
Now that my right arm does not go numb right away with using the mouse.
Last night, the bomb was dropped on me (non-chalantly might I add) that I was triple negative. It was wedged in there with the brush-off statement of "well, since those ovaries are going to have to come out" ... bubbling out of the 8-9 month pregnant genetic counselor. She must have forgotten she is talking to a 39 year old mom of a 2 and 4 year old, and did I mention that the biggest thing on my mind when i found this lump last month was "so IF I do get pregnant in the next month or so, I can still have the baby by the end of next summer, and so what if I will be 40...". Baby at 40 was the biggest thing on my mind ... not BIG FAT FUCKING NASTY AGGRESSIVE CANCER at 40.
F this.
I am scared beyond words, because we have no family nearby to help with the kids...dunno how we are going to do that yet ... but I really need to keep my HEAD in the right place so I can focus on getting better.
My tumor was apparently 5mm from the chest wall, and they "said" clear margin of 5mm. The oncologist is going to discuss with the Rad. Guy whether or not radiation will be needed ... seems like Oncology man is possibly thinking not? At this point, I will not mind if the Radiation Guy decides to recommend it, because this might be my one chance to catch any stray cells. Only one node, the sentinel node, was affected. they removed 11 more nodes and none showed and cancer ... can i just trust that? I dunno.
I will be calling my Breast Cancer Center today or tomorrow and asking them why I have not been hooked up with the dietitian they speak of ... I found out yesterday I currently weigh 113. I loose weight like mad under stress...
